Mindset – Scarcity or Abundance?

When my husband and I were first married we lived 9 miles away from the closest grocery store. And it was a small grocery store. We were 26 miles away from the closest Walmart. It took at least 20 minutes to drive round trip, to the little grocery store, if I forgot anything. To make sure I always had all of the groceries I might need I made a weekly list, I checked the staples to see if we were running low. I checked and rechecked to make sure that we had everything we may need for the week. My sister laughed at me whenever she came to visit because our fridge was always packed.

Fast forward almost 20 years. We now live within 3 miles of 2 different Walmart’s. I still make the weekly grocery list and I still worry trying to decide if we need more milk or if it will run out before the next grocery trip. Will I have enough eggs or should I get more?

What does this have to do with mindset? Just like I get stressed about making sure I have enough groceries I don’t always recognize the talents and abilities I have. Instead of focusing on all of the great things I can do I hyper focus on the things I don’t know how to do. I worry that there isn’t enough for me.

I having been learning about the abundance mindset. This is where you believe that there is enough for everyone. There is enough wealth, happiness and respect for everyone. Just like I don’t have to worry and stress about having enough groceries, believing that there is enough for everyone makes a huge difference.

So how do you change your mindset to focus on what is available instead of what you are lacking? One thing is to practice gratitude. Having just come through the Thanksgiving season I have tried to remain focused on all of the wonderful blessings I have been given. Focusing on the things, people and places we are grateful for helps shift our mindset to abundance and opportunity instead of focusing on all the things we lack.

Another way to change your mindset is to focus on growth. Instead of staying where you are find ways to grow your mind, talents or experiences. You can start a hobby just to learn something new. Listen to a podcast or read a book that stretches your mind to the possibilities of life. I personally love David Goggins and the things he teaches. He challenges me mind and my way of thinking.

Being open to trying new things is another way to help yourself grow. This one is probably the hardest for me. I love my world and I love things to be predictable. But there isn’t growth in staying the same. There isn’t a chance to learn if I never try something new. The stimulation that you get from the fear of trying something new helps to propel you forward.

Always being focused on what you are missing only amplifies all of the things you don’t have. To truly grow and change focus on all the possibilities and opportunities you have in your life. And try something scary.

I can’t; I can

One of my clients taught me a trick that has changed the way I think. She was stressed because she felt like she was being pulled in two different directions. One person wanted her to do something but she already had other plans and had promised a school shop tripping to her kids.

At first she was trying to figure out how she could do everything to make everyone happy. She was trying to squeeze way too much into one day. As the stress started to build she realized I can’t do all of this. I can’t go to the event that these people want me to. But I can make them dinner. I can’t spend the day at the event like they want. But I can give them a place to come back to rest.

When she realized that she could still do something for her friends her stress evaporated. She knew she couldn’t do what the other person wanted but she could still serve them in another way. She knew that although she wasn’t doing exactly what her friends wanted she was still doing good things for them.

I love this trick so much that I told her I was stealing it. This thought shift makes a huge difference in how I  think. Too often I think I must do everything and I must do it perfectly, it is overwhelming. When I step back and realize I can’t do this whole thing but I can do this part the pressure disappears.

Remember there is only so much time in the day. We can’t do everything but we can do something.